


Swanqueen Week 2017

by TheKingisaGirl



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Disney World & Disneyland, Divorce, Drunken Confessions, F/F, Fluff, Grandparents & Grandchildren, Jealousy, MILFs, Magical Pregnancy, Pregnant Evil Queen | Regina Mills
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-09
Updated: 2017-07-15
Packaged: 2018-11-29 22:00:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11449902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheKingisaGirl/pseuds/TheKingisaGirl
Summary: My first Swanqueen Week! All prompts completed except Day 6





	1. In for a Penny in for a Pound

**Author's Note:**

> Day 1, Sharing A(nother) Child

“You know this whole driving thing is quite easy when you’re actually trying to hit something!” 

Regina tried to hide her laugh at Emma’s imitation of Zelena’s accent. They had both had a few drinks, though not as much as Snow, who was passed out and snoring on the sofa.

Emma had called, at first complaining about Killian’s superstitions, then inviting her to an impromptu bachelorette party. Snow had, again, invited herself. It started a bit tense, but with the black fairy having been slain and wine being plentiful, all three women had gone from discussing the wedding, which still made Regina uneasy, to reminiscing. If nothing else, living in Storybrooke had taught them to enjoy moments of peace when they presented themselves.

“You’re lucky Zelena survived that whole magic absorption thing,” Emma continued after taking another swig.

“How do you figure?” Regina was still a bit annoyed at her sister's recklessness. 

“Well, just imagine little Robyn terrorizing these Storybrooke streets! The mayor's charge as number one delinquent.” Emma let out a laugh, throaty and much more like her than the girly one Regina had heard lately.

“Excuse me, but last I remember our son, the model teenager, was mowing down mailboxes after only a year in your care!” Regina said, a bit defensive but still joking.

“Not to mention that she would be the mayor’s and the sheriff's charge since you agreed to share responsibility.” The words were out before she really thought about them. Regina put her glass down. That is certainly enough wine for tonight.

“That’s true, but I think we did pretty good with the kid. We could handle it.” Emma smirked

“Henry didn’t have magic,” Regina pointed out, surprised that Emma so readily accepted the idea of them raising Robyn. Together.

“Do you think she will? Like early on? Jesus that would be…”

“A nightmare?”

“Nah.” Emma waved dismissively. “It’d be cute! She could make her toys dance. Pour her own milk… Like Matilda!” She seemed suddenly excited at the idea.

“Yes, and magic herself out of her crib and terrorize her teachers.” Regina frowned remembering those scenes.

“See, I feel like you and I watch movies differently...Anyway we could handle it. I mean we’ve defeated hell dogs and wraiths and kings. We moved the fucking moon, Regina, I think we could handle a magic kid.”

We. We did this, we did that. Some of the things Regina had almost forgotten. They seemed like they happened eons ago. Emma was slurring her speech slightly and her cheeks were pinker than usual, but her words were true. That was a saying wasn't it? A drunken mind speaks a sober heart? Would Emma really not mind raising a child with her? It was an utterly ridiculous thought… This was the night before Emma’s wedding and they were discussing parenting a child. A second child. Together.

As she saw the genuine look of wonder in Emma’s eyes at their achievements, Regina couldn’t help but think that they would be forever connected. Through Henry. No matter what happened with her and the pirate, they would always be Henry’s parents. His mothers. But probably only his. Maybe Emma would go on to have other children. Without her. With him.

“Yes well, luckily we won’t have to find out,” she said gathering their glasses. It was late and time to go home. Before she said something she’d regret. As she walked to the kitchen, she heard Emma mumble.

“Yeah… Lucky.”


	2. The Honest Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 2, July 10th, MILF

“You mean Mayor MILF over there? What the hell does she know about the senior community?”

Jaws dropped, eyes widened, and Emma’s eyebrows shot up so fast and violently she thought they’d cause a receding hairline. This was not how she had expected the county meeting to go. Living in Storybrooke had blinded her to the realities of the real American life, it seems.

Having recently joined the United States (to nobody's knowledge), Storybrooke was now expected to take part in all manner of meetings and functions. Such as this one. That had escalated quickly. Apparently Maine politics was not only an Old White Men’s club, but not at all ready to hear suggestions from a new face. Although, Regina’s input on the out of control old-age poverty numbers was legitimate. Or so Emma thought. She was having trouble remembering it now. 

“Excuse me? What did you just call me?” The tone in Regina’s voice told Emma she was about to explode into a rant that would definitely put Storybrooke on the map as the home of ‘unruly women’.

“Do you have any idea who I am?” She was far from done but Emma interrupted her to make sure she didn’t blow their cover.

“Councilman, as out of line as that was, I think all of us and the Mayor would like to hear the others’ opinions on her suggestion.” 

Oh boy...Emma was fucked. 

As Emma had feared, after the look Regina had thrown her the moment the comment had come out of her mouth, Regina had not spoken another word to her. That was four hours ago. She had kept her cold political demeanor up for the rest of the meeting. Until now that is. They were on their way back in the car. In silence. It was going to be an exceptionally long ride.

“What the hell were you thinking? Cutting me off like that!” Regina’s tone was so sharp it could cut diamonds, her hands white knuckled on the wheel.

It was an interesting question. Emma had been thinking a lot of things. After her initial shock, she had thought what an ass that guy was. Then she had thought about why he would pick that particular word. Then she had thought that, well Regina was rather attractive, which lead her down a rabbit hole of other thoughts that brought a bright blush to her face.

“Hello?” 

Oops. Zoned out again. “I… I mean-” before her stuttering lead to an actual complete thought, Regina intervened.

“Are you telling me you think what he said was acceptable?” she asked, incredulous and with something that almost sounded like hurt in her voice.

“No! God, Regina no! Of course not!”

“Yet you said nothing!” Hurt gone. Outrage back.

“I just didn’t want you to say something you would regret,” was all Emma could say.

“Do you think I am a child? What about what he said? He shouldn't regret that?” 

“No… yeah, but I mean, I doubt he does…” again Emma tried her best to stay away from what she thought had led to that particular description of Regina.

“It was despicable-”

“Yes!”

“And rude-”

“Yup.”

“And inappropriate-”

“Yeah”

“And untrue.”

“Yeah… Wait, what? Well technically…”

“WHAT? Portraying me as some type of prowling older women? You think he’s right?” She looked over focusing on Emma instead of the road.

“No Regina, of course not, but I was just saying, it technically only means mom I’d like to fuck…”

“Well, thank you for explaining that Ms. Swan,” she said sarcastically. “And that you agree with…”

“Well, yeah duh…”

The car was silent for a moment as they both reflected on the words just spoken. This was going to be a long ride home indeed. Not to mention the conversation she’d probably have to have with Killian when she got home… or with Snow… or worst of all Henry. She tried not to imagine his face as he told her that his mother was quite literally a MILF, to her.


	3. Day 3, Grandmothers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucy has some requests for her Grandmothers

“And no bed time on Saturdays, and Pizza every Tuesdays for lunch, and gumball machines that don’t cost money, and-” 

“Sweetheart. Lucy, I don’t think... Henry?” Regina looked to her son seeking help.

“Oh no Mom, don’t look at me. You invited this with the color change discussion. I’m only here in the official ‘driver’ capacity,” he said grinning.

It was true. She had asked Lucy about the new school colors. A new paint job was in order and there was no town code dictating the matter. So she had asked Lucy to chime in. After all, she was going to attend the school for the next five years. 

She had expected something like pink or yellow or maybe in rainbow colors. Her granddaughter loved rainbows. Instead she had made a list. Not her list, mind you, she had only compiled it. It was a long list of suggestions, more like demands, of things the kids in her class and the other first graders wanted changed around the town. The school colors did not even make the top ten.

She was her father’s daughter through and through. Not only had she composed this list, she had held elections on priority and announced herself as their (mini) representative. She would take their concerns to the officials: her grandmothers. Who better to hear their little voices than the Mayor and the Sheriff? This was not what Regina had in mind when she had told Lucy that she may have “whatever you like, Princess.”

So there they were. Emma and Henry hardly holding in their snickering as Lucy checked off item after item with a red crayon in her rainbow notebook.

“This is not funny Ms. Swan,” Regina hissed. Emma could hardly keep standing when Lucy turned the page.

“‘Lita are you listening?” Lucy said giving Regina a serious look.

“Of course, Princess, but I thought you were coming to play today?”

“No. We’re having a meeting, right Granma?” Emma nodded, unable to speak, lest she break out in laughter.

“Now you two need to listen, and maybe we can play later okay?” she said waving her crayon at them disapprovingly.

“Yes, Lucy” They said in unison. Their little Princess.


	4. It’s a small world after all

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 4, July 12th is Family Vacation

So they had let Henry talk them into Disney world. Well more like whined them into it. He had begged for way too long, guilt-tripping them about never going anywhere his whole life (Emma had countered that he had made a pretty substantial trip ALL BY HIMSELF at age ten), they never did anything spontaneous (Regina reminded him how their lives were basically one plot twist after another) and that it would be an adventure (even Snow had intervened, reminding him of the countless different realms and dangerous situation he had been in). In the end their weakness for him had won out and they had given in.

Orlando for three, please. As much as Henry would have thought it hilarious to bring a real live Prince and Princess to a Disney Park, his grandparents could not join them. Neal had chickenpox. 

They had spent all day having fun, eating churros, watching other people's children ride Dumbo for the first time and shooting aliens in Tomorrow Land. Of course there had been some slight hiccups; Henry had understandably refused to enter the Peter Pan ride, and Regina was completely outraged at the age of, and especially the portrayal of, the “Evil Queen” at the autograph signing. 

Emma was enjoying herself just watching them. Regina had hardly experienced this world, and seeing her and Henry so free made her heart feel warm and tingly. Sometimes, she felt sad seeing parents attend to their children so lovingly. She wished she could have had some childhood memories that were so positive. But Regina was there to comfort her and seeing Henry live the experience made it worthwhile.

After spending nearly 45 minutes in the designated Star Wars gift-shop, Emma's patience with Henry and Regina had reached its limit, no matter how cute it was to see Regina geek out over Princess Leia costumes for little girls, and Henry go on and on about the unappreciated comedic genius that was R2D2 and C3PO.

When they finally left the store it was Emma’s turn to pick something. She had read that the Small World ride was a classic that shouldn’t be missed so that was her choice.

Henry moaned and groaned and Regina voiced her concern at the stability and safety of the boats, but once they were seated and it was dark, they both seemed to appreciate it. 

In the front row Emma listened to Henry explain different countries he had learned about in school and their cultures. Once and awhile she looked back at the completely silent Regina and pointed out a cute polar bear or creepy clowns hanging from an air balloon. 

As the ride neared its end, Emma was almost worried that maybe Regina had been bothered by the dark, or annoyed by the songs. When the final display showed all the goodbyes, in over 25 different languages, she heard a sob behind her.

She and Henry turned and were shocked to see Regina crying. Actual tears streaming down her face.

“Mom?” Henry sounded more than a little worried. What on earth could make the Evil Queen cry in a children’s ride?

“I...I’m sorry it just…” Another sob interrupted her. As they climbed out of the boats Emma held onto her wife as tight as she could, still not understanding

“Regina, it’s okay.”

“No! No it’s not Emma! Did you see it? It had Welcome AND Goodbye in all the different languages, they were even singing in different languages! Did you hear them?

“Yes, Baby, but what-”

“They made it so that everybody was welcome, Emma! Everybody!”

“Yes, you’re right that was very nice.”

“Why didn’t I come up with that? Why couldn’t Storybrooke be like that?”

“Oh, baby.” now Emma understood.

“Because it would be weird if we sang every time some new villain showed up?” Henry offered, clearly at a loss with his over emotional mother.

“Can it, kid!” Emma whispered. 

It took her another 15 minutes and the promise of a second ice cream cone to calm Regina down. Magical pregnancies were no joke.


	5. When one door closes...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 5, July 13th is Divorced Mommies

“I’m sorry Mrs. Hood, but you are a bit early, we are not quite ready for you.”

“It’s Ms. Mills, is this your first day?”

The assistant apologized profusely and scampered off to get the beautiful dark haired woman a coffee. Black. 

“You’d think a divorce lawyer’s office would understand,” Emma offered in an undertone.

“Excuse me?” The woman gave her confused look. Confused and still frustrated.

“I.. I was just saying you’d expect a divorce lawyer’s office to be on top of the name thing.”

“Oh, yes well, I’m considering taking my business elsewhere.” The brunette looked around the room dismissively.

“They say she’s the best in town though.” And expensive as hell.

“That she is.” 

There was a pause in which Emma struggled to come up with something to say. She didn’t want the conversation to be over for some reason. With this woman, in her tailored suit and her no-time-for-your-bullshit attitude.

“Ma, the machine in the lobby only takes quarters,” Henry’s voice snapped her out of her stupor. She hadn’t even noticed the elevator open. How long had she been staring at that scar above her lip… Hopefully not too long for it to be weird. Suddenly, curious brown eyes were on her.

“Here, kid. But easy on the Coke okay?” She handed him a handful of change receiving only a grunt in response. Teenagers. She smiled at the stranger apologetically.

“My son, Henry. Usually he’s more agreeable but I had to drag him here.”

“Well, parents divorcing can be hard for children.”

“Oh no, no I’m not divorcing his father...Just…Well, my ex isn’t Henry’s parent. Never was.”

Another awkward silence.

“I’m Emma, by the way. The woman formerly known as Mrs. Jones.”

She smirked. She fucking smirked... A women who understood a Prince reference was golden in Emma’s book.

“I’m -” 

But before she could finish, “Regina Mills, get you’re newly single ass in here!” A blonde woman Emma recognized as one of the partners said loudly behind the front desk. 

Regina pressed two perfectly manicured fingers against her temple.

“Kathryn, for the love of God… I apologize,” she clipped in Emma’s direction.

Emma could not hold back a laugh. “It’s cool,” she said still chuckling as Regina’s (Emma hoped) friend, approached the waiting room.

“You need a new receptionist, Emma and I have decided,” Regina said now standing.

“Maybe, but you need a new man!” the blonde cackled. Regina rolled her eyes dramatically.

“On that note, please excuse us, Emma, I need to go beat some sense into my friend...”

“It was nice meeting you.” Emma smiled and Regina returned it full force.

“A pleasure.” 

She watched the sway of Regina’s hips as she followed Kathryn down the hall, trying not to be too obvious about it.

Once settled in her office with a cup of hot coffee and a look of complete displeasure on her face, Regina prepared to discuss her settlement with Kathryn.

“Alright, I’m sorry,” Kathryn said, giving her a guilty look. Regina was not truly angry at her behavior. They had known each other so long she expected the worst from her.

“I was wrong to say that you need a new man. When you clearly are angling for a woman.” Kathryn smirked while Regina wanted to bang her head against the desk

“Want me to set you up?”


	6. The green eyed monster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Day 7, July 15th is Parent Trap

“Dude, I’m really not the right person for this. I mean your mom and I…” Lily searched for the right words.

“You used to be girlfriends? Yeah, I know. That's why you’re the perfect person to help me!”

“I wouldn’t call it girlfriends...Wait, who the hell told you that?”

“Lily, come on...I have two moms and I’m 14. Also I have eyes.” Henry said, looking an awful lot like Regina.

“I...Well you have a point.”

“I have several. But let’s stay on topic okay?”

“So what? You want me to use my vast experience of three whole days with Emma to help you figure out how to trick them together?”

“Silly Dragon, tricks are for kids. I have a foolproof plan. It’s called ‘Operation Cyclops.’”

“Very funny. What the fu-urack does this have to do with a cyclops?”

“Nothing, Which makes it perfect. Nice save by the way,” Lily smirked. The little shit.

“Why do I get the feeling that this is like your thing?”

“Cause you’re smart. Now let’s go over the plan…”

\------SQSQSQ------

“Lily, are you sure you’re okay?” 

Emma seemed genuinely concerned. Lily couldn't really blame her. She had probably expected some big war meeting about who Lily’s dad was. Instead, what she got was a touchy-feely brunch in full view of her son and his other mother. This was not going according to plan.

Not that it wasn’t working. Lily could clearly see Regina seething in her booth, trying to pretend she was listening to anything Henry was telling her about his newest video game. The look in her eyes hadn’t changed much from the moment she had come over to ask them to join her and Henry. Lily had declined for the both of them.

However, Lily had planned to be much smoother about this. She felt awkward and out of place about this whole interaction. Yes, way back when they met, there had been some type of spark between them, but now? Lily felt like she was pretend-hitting on her sister. And Emma seemed to share the feeling. She looked uncomfortable.

Lily let out a fake laugh.” Oh, Emma of course.” Oh God. She hated herself right now. As she put her hand on Emma’s wrist, she decided the kid owed her one. 

Emma gave her unsure smile and Regina’s eye widened. 

For another ten minutes they spoke about old times and their lives. This made Lily much more comfortable, she even started enjoying herself. They joked. What might have suggested flirting to Regina was really just relaxed banter. 

When the Mayor looked to be about at her breaking point, Lily decided to deliver the finishing blow. She leaned in close over the table and signaled Emma to do the same. Before she could whisper the short version of Henry’s plan into her ear, her mother appeared, seemingly out of thin air. Dragons...

“Savior. A word.” She pulled Emma out of her seat and almost dragged her to the back of the dinner. All Lily could do was stare at Henry in shock. He mirrored her expression.

What in the actual fuck?

Meanwhile by the jukebox:

“Emma, I know I owe it to you that I have my daughter with me at all, but make no mistake I will incinerate you if you lay even a finger on her.” Mal’s grip on Emma’s arm became a bit stronger.

“What now?”

“I saw you. You and her. Under no circumstances is this happening.” 

“Mal, I swear-”

“While I absolutely agree, I am going to have to ask you to take your hands off Ms. Swan.” Regina had stepped next to the jukebox. Her tiny stature doing nothing to diminish her threatening aura.

Mal threw her a suspicious look. She turned her attention back to Emma, pinning her with a glare, but spoke to Regina.

“You will deal with this accordingly?” Mal sounded like a principle holding off on giving detention. Emma would have rolled her eyes had she not been so completely surprised by Regina’s answer.

“I will.”

Mal let Emma’s arm go and returned to sit with her daughter and Henry who had now changed tables.

“Well damn. What the hell was that?”

“I could ask you the same thing Em-ma.” Her brow was furrowed.

“You’re not seriously mad too are you? I mean, granted, I would never go for Lily, but...Mal overreacted right? I wouldn't really be such a bad catch?” she bit her lip.

“No. No you would not.” Regina expression softened.

\--------SQSQSQSQ-----

“That go according to you foolproof plan kid?” Lily’s words dripped with sarcasm.

“Nope. It went even better,“ he said smiling at her, and then at Mal, who was pursing her lips at their antics. Children...


End file.
